Flowers for the lady?

Sex joke

sex stories

A guy comes home to his wife one evening with a big bunch of flowers and she says "I suppose this means I have to get on my back with my legs open for the next three days".
The husband says "Why? Don't you have any vases?"

story by: The Porn Joker



Tags: sex joke sex story

Author: The Porn Joker



Related sex stories:

  • Tonight and tomorrow

    When we got within 30 minutes from where Bob and Amy was, Jacqui called Amy and told her we was almost there and ask if they were ready for a wild night. We found a little rv park and begun to set up. Mike, Dave and I got things set up rather fast as the girls were working on some dinner. Jacqui called Amy and told her where we were and told them to check out of the motel and...

  • Gang bang with Jackie

    I unzipped my pants and allowed them to fall to the floor. She ripped away my jocks and my half-hard cock sprung up into her face.I was born well endowed. My cock measures a good 10 inches. The problem with it is that many women can’t accommodate me - not given the thrashing I want to give them anyway. There are some people that know what they are talking about… and then there is Jackie.Jac (more…)

  • As it should be part 2

    There were so many rules to obey, yet there was so much we didn't cover before He left for work. Why was it so difficult, I just had to think and decide. Oh the irony! And He continued to delight in her frustration, her confusion, her angst. Such an obedient slave he mused, which was a good result for slave, He thought, although He was itching to punish her. And so His day continued where He didn't get a lot...

  • Hot Story of Sex with Twins

    I brought my tongue to rest on her joy, holding it pulsating it with small movements direct on the place she wanted kissed the most. She grabbed hold of my head again. I started to run my tongue in small circles around her clit slowly, direct, purposeful. I licked not moving my head just working my tongue so she grabbed my hair and pulled my head down. Sometimes dreams do come true.I had lived next door (more…)

  • My Best Masturbation Story

    I thought it was cute, this 55 year old guy, happily married with two kids (one my age) kept looking at me while I masturbated. I wondered if he thought about me when he fucked his wife. The thought of it, sent a pleasure hit straight to my zucchini fucked cunt and as I came hard the little green fellow slipped out of my hand as my juice squirted across the table and trickled to the floor. I have never...

Sex with a Stranger in a Panel Shop

New years prep

Sean shows me how sex should be

Wife wants me to drop her off at Adult Theater

New found customers

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.